Student Name: Edward Lerpiniere
Student Number: 506079
Thank you for sending me your first assignment for your DPP course. The learning log is well laid out and the work looks great.
Assessment potential Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Quality of Outcome, Demonstration of Creativity
You may want to get credit for your hard work and achievements with the OCA by formally submitting your work for assessment at the end of the module. More and more people are taking the idea of lifelong learning seriously by submitting their work for assessment but it is entirely up to you. We are just as keen to support you whether you study for pleasure or to gain qualifications. Please consider whether you want to put your work forward for assessment and let me know your decision when you submit Assignment 2. I can then give you feedback on how well your work meets the assessment requirements.”
I’m not sure whether or not the information and question above is directed at me individually or it’s there as a general thing for everyone who gets a feedback report; I am working toward the full degree.
Feedback on assignment Demonstration of technical and Visual Skills, Quality of Outcome, Demonstration of Creativity
Your workflow has been explained well on your learning log and seems very organised and effective. It would be good to see your thoughts on the images you have chosen, what you wanted to achieve, whether you feel you achieved what you set out to.
Library – Children’s’ Workshop
This is a very vibrant image, the viewer of the image feels like they are one of the people sat within the group of people here.
Library – Computer Games?
The line of the desks, computer screens, chairs and people creates a strong diagonal line within the composition. This is then echoed by the lines of the bricks and the blinds. I think you are losing a little detail in the highlights in this image which is something to be careful of. For example on the lighter areas, the t – shirt in the foreground and the woman in the middle’s hair appear washed out and lacking detail.
I’ve looked at this very closely in Lightroom and CS 5 and I can’t see any evidence of highlight clipping where you suggest. There is some in the window, between the vertical blind slats, but I wasn’t too concerned about that as removing it wouldn’t give any detail a lift.
Sheltered Accommodation – Craft Club
Using a wide angle lens here has made an interesting effect on the composition with the chairs used to frame the image and looking oddly oversized and slightly comical. I think this works well to lead your eye into the image.
Coffee and a Chat or Coffee, Read and a Smoke
I think that this image would be more effective if you hady gone in closer and really focused on the people without the distractions of the board and pillars in the foreground. Often a photograph is as much about what you leave out of the image as what you put in. Always look around the viewfinder and check that everything is essential to the image and the message that you as a photographer are trying to get across to the viewer.
I’ve changed this image for another and hopefully this has a better feel about it. I must say I liked the other as I felt the board and pillars gave diagonals to lead the eye, but I’m still learning so I’m probably wrong.
Again with this image there are distracting elements on the left and the right of the image. I think the image would be greatly improved by going in closer and filling the frame more with the window and the woman.
I see your point here and I’ve changed the crop to concentrate on the figure of the woman more.
Learning Logs or Blogs/Critical essays Context
I would like to see more analysis of your images, what you hoped to achieve and whether you feel you achieved it. The learning log in terms of the exercises and the workflow information is very in depth.
I have a tendency to be blinkered when it comes to what I’m doing and I didn’t take into account that although the assignment is about Workflow, the images forming part of that assignment also need to be considered as aesthetically as a straight ‘photo shoot’ and analysed in the same way. To a certain extent I’ve considered them just a means to an end to illustrate the true object of the assignment. I will concentrate more on this in future.
Having said that, I have made the point, within my text, about the series being about pleasure, and how it’s derived by the individual. Each image portrays a different way of obtaining that pleasure and the captions with each image detail the pleasure I think they’re feeling.
Suggested reading/viewing Context
Pointers for the next assignment
Concentrate on composition and what you really want the viewer to look at.